What to Do Instead of an Anniversary Gift
Plenty of couples stop buying anniversary gifts and are happier for it. The house is full, the money is better spent elsewhere, and the gift hunt was never the enjoyable part.
The risk is that 'no gifts' quietly becomes 'nothing', and one of you ends up disappointed on the day without saying so.
The fix is to replace the gift with something specific rather than with an absence - and to still send the card. A card isn't a gift; it's the record.
Anniversary cards, printed in the UK
If you're skipping the gift, send the card. Blank inside, printed in the UK, posted first class.
Things to do instead
- Go back to where you married, or where the reception was, and have one drink.
- Cook the same meal every year and make it the tradition.
- A day off together with the phones in a drawer.
- Write each other a letter to be opened in five years.
- Book something for later in the year and let that be the gift.
- A walk, a pub and no plan - which is what most couples actually want.
Traditions worth starting
- One photo of the two of you in the same spot every year.
- A bottle put away on the wedding day and opened on a round number.
- The same restaurant, same table, same order.
- A yearly letter kept in the same box.
- A list each year of the best thing that happened, written down and kept.
Giving to something else instead
- Donate what you'd have spent to the same charity each year.
- Put the money towards the thing you're both saving for.
- Pay for a night out for whoever looked after the children.
- Sponsor something in both your names.
How to agree no gifts without it going wrong
- Say it weeks ahead, not the night before.
- Be specific: 'no presents, but let's do dinner at home' rather than 'don't bother'.
- Agree that cards still count - most 'no gifts' arguments are actually about the card.
- Check again the year it changes. A milestone year often wants marking differently.
- If one of you secretly wants a present, say so now rather than sulking on the day.
How to write it so it lands
- Agree it weeks ahead, in plain words.
- Replace the gift with something specific, not with nothing.
- Cards still count. Send one.
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We make cards, pin badges, prints and party bits in house. These are from other shops we rate, and buying through the link costs you nothing extra.
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Frequently asked questions
Is it OK not to buy an anniversary gift?
Yes, as long as you both agree in advance and replace the gift with something specific - a meal, a day out, a tradition. Most couples still send a card.
What can you do instead of an anniversary present?
Go back to where you married, cook the same meal each year, take a day off together, write each other a letter, or put the money towards something you're saving for.
Should you still send a card if you've agreed no gifts?
Yes. A card is a record rather than a present, and it's the part people keep. 'No gifts' rarely means 'no card'.
What is a good example of what to do instead of an anniversary gift?
"Go back to where you married, or where the reception was, and have one drink." is one of 20 examples on this page. Pick the one closest to the tone you want, then add a specific detail of your own - a shared memory, a date, a name - so it reads as yours rather than copied.