Valentine's Day Card Messages

Valentine's day card messages: what to write in 2027

The hardest part of Valentine's day isn't the card, it's the blank inside. Shop-bought verses do the job for nobody, and most people freeze somewhere between too soppy and too sarcastic.

These Valentine's messages are grouped by tone so you can match the card to your actual relationship, whether that's five months in, fifteen years in, or a running joke that's outlasted both.

Funny Valentine's messages

  • Happy Valentine's day. You're still the best decision I've made while tired. Shop this card
  • I love you more than I love complaining, and that's saying something. Shop this card
  • Roses are expensive in February, so here's a card and my full attention. Shop this card
  • Happy Valentine's day to the person who tolerates me daily and rarely mentions it. Shop this card

Romantic Valentine's messages

  • Every ordinary day is better because you're in it. Happy Valentine's day. Shop this card
  • I'd choose this life with you again, without thinking about it. Shop this card
  • Thank you for the small things you do that you assume I don't notice. Shop this card
  • Happy Valentine's day. Still you, still us, still lucky. Shop this card

Short Valentine's messages

Valentine's cards

Funny and rude Valentine's designs, printed in the UK.

Funny Valentine's Day greeting card for her, featuring the simple text message You're Nice. You're Nice Valentines Day Card £3.87 Humorous Valentine's Day greeting card for her featuring the message You're OK. You're OK Valentines Day Card £3.87 Valentine's Day greeting card for her with the text Olive Juice, a playful pun on I love you. Olive Juice (Happy Valentines Day) Card £3.87 Funny Valentine's Day greeting card for him featuring the text Thanks For Texting Me Back Sometimes. Thanks For Texting Me Back (Sometimes) Valentines Day Card £3.87 Funny Valentine's Day card for emos and goths featuring the text 'I Tolerate You' in an alternative style. I Tolerate You Valentines Day Card For Emos & Goths £3.87 Minimalist square Valentine's Day card featuring a line illustration of hands forming a heart shape on a clean background. Happy Valentines Day Card With Heart Hand Gesture £3.87 A funny Valentine's card designed as a green WhatsApp-style chat bubble reading: Will You Be My Valentine? Will You Be My Valentine? (WhatsApp Message Valentines Day Card) £3.75 Funny Valentine's Day card for her, designed like a WhatsApp text bubble asking 'If you're not busy...'. If You're Not Busy... (WhatsApp Message Valentines Day Card) £3.87 Funny Valentine's Day card with bold text reading 'There Are No Words To Describe How I Feel' next to a white envelope. There Are No words To Describe How I Feel (Valentines Day Card) £3.75 Funny adult Valentine's Day card for him featuring the text 'Happy Valentine's Day To My Favourite Asshole'. Happy Valentines Day To My Favourite Asshole Greetings Card £3.87 Funny Valentine's Day card with the cheeky text 'The petrol station was out of flowers, will these do?' The Petrol Station Was Out Of Flowers, Will These Do? (Valentines Day Card) £3.87 Taylor Swift-inspired Valentine's Day card with the text 'I Was Enchanted To Meet You' in a modern romantic font. I Was Enchanted To Meet You (Taylor Swift-Inspired) Valentines Day Card £3.87

Valentine's gifts to go with the card

Candles and coasters that beat a supermarket bouquet.

Relax I Have a Spreadsheet For That Funny Drinks Coaster Relax I Have a Spreadsheet For That Funny Drinks Coaster £3.75 Manifest That Shit Funny Candle Pin Badge (Small) Manifest That Shit Funny Candle Pin Badge (Small) £4.00 Pack of 6 Small Cartoon Dog Drinks Coasters Pack of 6 Small Cartoon Dog Drinks Coasters £4.50 Pack of 6 Minimalist Wooden Drinks Coasters Pack of 6 Minimalist Wooden Drinks Coasters £4.50 Pack of 6 Minimalist Wooden Sun & Mood Astrology Coasters Pack of 6 Minimalist Wooden Sun & Mood Astrology Coasters £4.50 Pack of 6 Vibrant Cat Drinks Coasters Pack of 6 Vibrant Cat Drinks Coasters £4.50 Pack of 6 Vibrant Dog Drinks Coasters Pack of 6 Vibrant Dog Drinks Coasters £4.50 Pack of 6 Fun Cartoon Drinks Coasters Pack of 6 Fun Cartoon Drinks Coasters £4.50 Pack of 6 Fun Geometric Pattern Drinks Coasters Pack of 6 Fun Geometric Pattern Drinks Coasters £4.50 Thank You Gift Funny Candle Absolutely Bloody Brilliant Thank You Gift Funny Candle Absolutely Bloody Brilliant £15.49 Thank You Gift Funny Soy Wax Candle Good Egg Thank You Gift Funny Soy Wax Candle Good Egg £15.49 Funny Divorce Gift Candle Newly Single Get Rid of Him Funny Divorce Gift Candle Newly Single Get Rid of Him £15.49

Where to shop next

Frequently asked questions

What should I write in a Valentine's card for a new relationship?

Keep it light and specific: mention something you enjoyed together recently rather than making a declaration you're not ready for.

Is a funny Valentine's card a bad idea?

Not if humour is how you two talk. A joke plus one honest line at the end is the safest combination.

When should I order for Valentine's day?

Order by around the 9th of February for first class delivery in time for the 14th.