40th birthday party ideas

A 40th is usually the first birthday people plan properly: a real venue, a proper guest list, and a budget that would have bought three 21sts. It is also the birthday most likely to be a surprise, which changes almost every step of the planning.

The core decision is scale. A sit-down meal for twenty and a hall party for eighty are different events with different costs, and choosing early stops the budget drifting.

Below are 40th birthday party ideas by style, UK costs for each, and a countdown that starts three months out — plus how to keep a surprise actually secret.

Where to hold a 40th birthday party

• A hotel function suite, the low-effort option: room, bar, catering and staff in one booking, usually priced on request against a minimum spend. Shop this card
• A pub function room, still the best value for a relaxed evening — free hire on a £250 to £500 bar spend outside London. Shop this card
• A restaurant private dining room for a smaller sit-down group. Shop this card
• A barn or countryside venue, which looks the part and costs accordingly. Shop this card
• A marquee at home, best value if you already have the garden for it. Shop this card
• A weekend away for a dozen people, instead of a party. Shop this card

40th birthday party themes and ideas

• Black tie, because it is the one birthday people will dress up for without complaint. Shop this card
• Life begins at 40, played straight rather than as a joke. Shop this card
• The 1980s or 1990s, depending on the birth year, with a playlist to match. Shop this card
• Wine or whisky tasting, hosted at home or by a local merchant. Shop this card
• Garden party with a hog roast or food van. Shop this card
• Casino or quiz night, for a group that prefers doing to standing. Shop this card

Planning countdown

• 12 weeks out: set the budget, decide the scale, book the venue. Shop this card
• 10 weeks out: book catering and music while dates are still open. Shop this card
• 8 weeks out: send invitations, or brief the surprise co-conspirators. Shop this card
• 6 weeks out: order the cake and confirm any hired equipment. Shop this card
• 4 weeks out: plan the running order — speeches, food, cake, first dance if there is one. Shop this card
• 3 weeks out: buy cards, gifts and decorations. Shop this card
• 2 weeks out: confirm final numbers and pay balances. Shop this card
• 1 week out: brief helpers, print a timings sheet, arrange transport. Shop this card

What it costs in the UK

• Hotel function suite: most quote on request rather than a fixed rate, and the hire is usually folded into a minimum spend on catering and bar. Shop this card
• Pub function room: free hire against a minimum bar spend of £250 to £500 outside London, £1,000 and up in central London. Shop this card
• Catering: buffet £10 to £35 a head; a served sit-down meal typically £35 to £80 a head. Shop this card
• Music: a live band averages about £1,100 across UK listings; a DJ is £350 to £800 for the evening, more in London and the South East. Shop this card
• Marquee, tables and lighting: a fully fitted marquee for 100 with flooring, lighting and heating runs £4,000 upwards; a bare 6m x 12m frame is nearer £800 a day. Shop this card
• Total for 80 guests: roughly £2,500 to £6,000, depending almost entirely on catering. Shop this card

40th birthday cards

The card for the guest of honour, posted from the UK.

Cards for everyone signing

Extra cards for the guests who forgot theirs.

How to write it so it lands

• Decide the scale before the theme; everything else follows from it.
• For a surprise, control one thing only: how they get to the venue.
• Pay for staff or a caterer if you want to enjoy your own party.

Where to shop next

• What to write in a 40th birthday card
• 40th birthday cards
• Birthday party ideas
• Milestone birthday cards
• Buy a birthday card online
• Buy party supplies
• Party supplies
• Pin badges
• 18th birthday party planning
• 21st birthday party planning
• 30th birthday party planning
• 50th birthday party planning
• 60th birthday party planning
• 70th birthday party planning
• 80th birthday party planning
• Birthday pin badges

Frequently asked questions

What are good 40th birthday party ideas?

A black tie evening in a function suite, a garden party with a hog roast, or a wine tasting for a smaller group. Pick the scale first — twenty people sitting down and eighty standing up are different budgets entirely.

How much does a 40th birthday party cost in the UK?

For 80 guests, roughly £2,500 to £6,000, driven mostly by catering: a buffet at £12 a head against a served sit-down meal at £45 a head is a £2,600 difference on its own.

How do you plan a surprise 40th birthday party?

Give one trusted person the job of getting them to the venue, invite guests by group message rather than post, and put a decoy plan in the diary. Most surprises leak in the last fortnight, so keep the guest list off shared calendars.

How far in advance should you book a 40th?

Three months for a venue and caterer, six if you want a Saturday in summer or a popular local venue.

How long should speeches be at a 40th?

Two speakers, five minutes each, before the food rather than after. Anything longer and the room drifts to the bar.