Practical Help To Offer Instead Of Words
Practical help to offer instead of words
Open offers put the work on the person least able to do it. Specific offers with a date attached get said yes to.
Assume the answer is yes, name a time, and make it easy to cancel.
Thinking of you cards
A short handwritten line in a card lands better than a long message on a phone.
Food and shopping
- I am cooking double on Tuesday - dropping a portion at six, no need to be dressed.
- Doing a big shop Thursday. Send me a list, any length.
- Leaving bread, milk and something sweet on the step this morning.
Admin and logistics
- I can sit with you while you do the phone calls. They are worse alone.
- Send me the forms and I will fill in what I can before you check them.
- I will drive you to the appointment and wait in the car park.
Time and childcare
- Taking the kids to the park Saturday morning. Two hours of quiet for you.
- I will do the school run all next week. It is already sorted.
- Walking the dog at six each evening this fortnight.
Company
- Coming round Sunday with a film. We do not have to talk.
- Same table, same pub, same time each month. Turn up or do not.
Browse sympathy and thinking of you cards
How to write it so it lands
- Give a time and a get-out clause in the same message.
- Repeat the same offer rather than rotating new ones.
- Do the boring jobs - they are the ones nobody volunteers for.
Where to shop next
- What to say after a miscarriage
- What to say when someone is made redundant
- What to say after a serious diagnosis
- What to say when someone moves into care
- Death anniversary messages
- What not to say when someone is grieving
- How to support someone months later
- Sympathy and difficult moments guides
- All guide FAQs
- All guides
- Planning the party? Birthday party ideas
- How to make a balloon arch
- Photo booth prop ideas
Frequently asked questions
Why do people refuse help?
Because accepting it means admitting how bad things are, and because vague offers require them to invent a task. Name the task yourself.
How do you offer money without embarrassment?
Attach it to a specific bill or treat - covering a food shop, a train fare, a month of a subscription - rather than handing over cash.
What if the family already has lots of help?
Take a later slot. Week six is usually empty when week one was crowded.