Holy Communion: What It Is, What Happens and What To Expect

Holy Communion

Holy Communion is the sacrament in which bread and wine are shared in remembrance of the Last Supper. It's also called the Eucharist, Mass, the Lord's Supper or the Blessed Sacrament, depending on the tradition.

Most people searching for it are either curious about the service itself or have been invited to a First Holy Communion - the day a child, usually aged seven to nine in the Catholic Church, receives it for the first time.

Both are covered below, along with what to wear, what to bring and what to do if you're not taking communion yourself.

Cards for a First Holy Communion

Blank inside so you can write something the child will keep. Printed in the UK, posted first class.

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What Holy Communion is

  • A sacrament instituted at the Last Supper, when Jesus shared bread and wine with the disciples.
  • Catholics believe the bread and wine become the body and blood of Christ; most Protestant traditions understand it as a memorial or a spiritual presence.
  • Called Mass in the Catholic Church, Holy Communion or Eucharist in the Church of England, the Lord's Supper in many free churches.
  • Received weekly by many, less often in some traditions.
  • In the Catholic Church, First Holy Communion follows preparation classes and usually a first confession.

What happens at a First Holy Communion

  • Children prepare over months, often through the parish or a Catholic school.
  • First confession, or reconciliation, usually comes shortly before.
  • The children process in together, often in white - dresses and veils for girls, suits for boys.
  • The Mass follows its normal shape: readings, homily, the Liturgy of the Eucharist.
  • The children receive communion for the first time, usually as a group at the front.
  • Photographs afterwards, then a family party at home or a venue.
  • It's a major family occasion, comparable to a christening in scale.

What to wear

  • The child: traditionally white - a dress and veil, or a suit. Parishes vary and some ask for school uniform.
  • Guests: smart. More formal than a christening, less than a wedding.
  • Nothing that competes with the children in white.
  • Modest dress in church - covered shoulders are appreciated in Catholic parishes.
  • Comfortable shoes; the Mass runs an hour or more.

If you're a guest and not Catholic

  • You're welcome at the Mass. You don't need to do anything except stand and sit with everyone else.
  • You shouldn't receive communion if you're not a Catholic in good standing - it's not a slight, it's the church's rule.
  • You can go up with your arms crossed over your chest for a blessing instead, which is normal and expected.
  • Or stay in your seat. Nobody is watching.
  • Join in the responses if you'd like to, or don't.
  • Follow the family's lead on photographs.

Gifts and cards

  • A card is expected; a gift is usual from family and godparents.
  • Traditional gifts: a Bible, a rosary, a missal, a cross, or a keepsake with the date.
  • Money is common and often goes to savings.
  • Guests typically spend £10 to £25, family £25 to £50, godparents more.
  • See our First Holy Communion gifts guide for a fuller list and wording.

When it happens

  • First Holy Communion is normally at age seven to nine in the Catholic Church.
  • Usually in the spring - April to June is the busiest season in UK parishes.
  • Often on a Saturday or a Sunday morning, in groups from the same parish or school.
  • Anglican practice varies; some parishes admit children to communion before confirmation, others after.

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How to write it so it lands

  • Ask the parents whether photography is allowed during the Mass - most parishes restrict it.
  • Arms crossed over the chest is the universal signal for 'blessing, not communion'.
  • Write the child's name and the date in the card. It's going in the memory box.

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Frequently asked questions

What is Holy Communion?

The sacrament of sharing bread and wine in remembrance of the Last Supper. It's also known as the Eucharist, Mass or the Lord's Supper, and understandings of it differ between Catholic and Protestant traditions.

What happens at a First Holy Communion?

After months of preparation and usually a first confession, children receive communion for the first time during Mass, traditionally dressed in white, followed by photographs and a family celebration.

How old are children at First Holy Communion?

Usually seven to nine in the Catholic Church, most often in the spring term of the school year.

Can non-Catholics take communion?

No - the Catholic Church reserves communion for Catholics in good standing. You're very welcome to go up with your arms crossed for a blessing instead, or to stay seated.

What do you wear to a First Holy Communion?

Smart clothes, more formal than a christening. Avoid white, which is for the children, and keep shoulders covered in a Catholic church.

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