What Is A Christening? The Service, The Roles and What To Expect

What is a christening?

A christening is the service in which a baby is baptised and formally named within the church. In the Church of England it's the same sacrament as baptism - water, promises and a welcome into the church family.

If you've been invited and you're not religious, or haven't been to one in twenty years, this is what actually happens and what's expected of you.

It's shorter than people expect: usually twenty to thirty minutes, often within a Sunday service, sometimes as a standalone ceremony.

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What happens in the service

  • The family and godparents gather at the front, usually by the font.
  • The vicar welcomes everyone and explains what's about to happen.
  • A reading and a short talk, often on the theme of welcome or light.
  • The parents and godparents make promises - the decision - on the child's behalf.
  • The child is signed with the cross, sometimes with oil.
  • Water is poured over the child's head three times, in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.
  • A lit candle is given, symbolising light and the passing on of faith.
  • Prayers, a blessing, and a welcome from the congregation.
  • Photographs afterwards, then usually a buffet at home or a hall.

Who does what

  • The parents choose the godparents, answer the promises, and hold the child.
  • Godparents make promises on the child's behalf and support their upbringing.
  • The vicar or priest leads the service and does the baptising.
  • Guests witness the promises and answer one line as a congregation.
  • Grandparents usually do the crying.

Christening vs baptism vs naming ceremony

  • Baptism is the sacrament - the water itself - and applies at any age.
  • A christening is an infant baptism, including the naming and the godparents.
  • A dedication or thanksgiving is a blessing without baptism, used by some churches so the child can choose later.
  • A naming ceremony is entirely non-religious, often led by a celebrant or registrar.
  • Catholic and Church of England services differ in detail but follow the same shape.

What to wear as a guest

  • Smart casual is right for almost every christening. Think Sunday best, not a wedding.
  • Men: shirt and trousers, jacket optional. Suits are fine but rarely required.
  • Women: a dress or smart separates. Hats are not expected.
  • Nothing too revealing in a church, and nothing white that competes with the gown.
  • Comfortable shoes - there's usually standing about for photographs.
  • Children can wear whatever they'll tolerate.

What to bring

  • A card, always. It gets kept.
  • A gift if you want to - see our christening gift ideas.
  • Cash for a collection, if the church takes one.
  • Something quiet for your own children.
  • Nothing else. It isn't a wedding.

Etiquette for the day

  • Arrive ten minutes early; latecomers get seated at the back.
  • Phones on silent. Ask before photographing during the service itself.
  • You don't have to say the prayers or sing if you don't want to.
  • You won't be asked to take communion, and it's fine not to.
  • Stay for the buffet. That's the bit the family organised for you.
  • Say something to the godparents. Nobody ever does.

Organising one

  • Contact your parish church - most will christen a child living in the parish, and there's usually no fee for the service itself.
  • Expect a meeting with the vicar and sometimes a short preparation session.
  • Choose godparents early and ask them properly.
  • Typical timing is three to twelve months old, but there's no deadline.
  • Book the reception venue before you fix the date if numbers are large.
  • Order of service sheets, decorations and a cake are optional and easy to overdo.

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How to write it so it lands

  • Take a card even if you're taking a gift. The card is the thing that survives.
  • Ask before photographing during the service - many churches allow it, some don't.
  • Sit near the front if you're family; the font is usually at the back or side and everyone cranes.

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Frequently asked questions

What is a christening?

A church service in which a baby is baptised with water and formally welcomed into the Christian faith, with parents and godparents making promises on the child's behalf.

How long does a christening last?

Usually twenty to thirty minutes. It may sit inside a Sunday service, which makes the whole thing about an hour.

What is the difference between a christening and a baptism?

Baptism is the sacrament itself and can happen at any age. A christening is an infant baptism that includes the naming and the appointment of godparents. For a baby, they are effectively the same service.

What do you wear to a christening?

Smart casual. A shirt and trousers or a dress is right; suits and hats are not expected, and avoid anything white that competes with the christening gown.

Do you have to be religious to attend a christening?

Not at all. You're there as a guest. You don't need to sing, pray or take communion, and nobody will notice or mind.

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