Naming ceremony

A naming ceremony is the non-religious way of marking a child's arrival: the same gathering, the same promises, the same buffet, without the church. It has no legal status - the birth registration does that - and no fixed script, which is the whole point.

It's also used for older children, adopted children and blended families, where a christening would sit awkwardly and doing nothing feels wrong.

Below: what happens, what it costs, who leads it, what the godparent equivalent is called, and wording you can lift straight into the day.

What happens at a naming ceremony

• Everyone gathers - a garden, a hall, a hotel, a living room, anywhere you like.
• The celebrant welcomes the guests and explains why you're all there.
• The child's name is announced and its meaning or origin explained.
• The parents make promises to the child, out loud.
• Guide parents, supporting adults or mentors make their own promises.
• Readings or poems, chosen by the family or by the people reading them.
• A symbolic act: candle lighting, planting a tree, a wishing tree, hand prints, a time capsule.
• Grandparents and siblings are often given a role.
• Signing of a certificate, then photographs and food.
• Typically twenty to forty minutes.

Who leads it

• A registrar - available from most UK register offices, held at approved venues, more formal and script-based.
• An independent or humanist celebrant - fully bespoke wording, any venue, any day.
• A family member or friend - free, personal, and perfectly valid since the ceremony has no legal effect.
• Humanists UK accredit celebrants, if you want a non-religious ceremony done professionally.

What it costs in the UK

• Register office naming ceremony: roughly £150 to £250 depending on the council and venue.
• Independent or humanist celebrant: roughly £250 to £450.
• Led by a friend or family member: nothing.
• Venue hire for a hall: £50 to £200 for the afternoon.
• Catering: £8 to £15 a head for a buffet, or do it yourself.
• Decorations, cake and printing: £50 to £150.
• A typical DIY naming day for forty people comes in around £400 to £700 all in.

Guide parents instead of godparents

• The non-religious equivalent goes by several names: guide parent, guardian, mentor, supporting adult, odd parent.
• Choose as many as you like - there's no rule about numbers or genders.
• They make a promise out loud during the ceremony, usually one or two lines.
• Give them the wording in advance so nobody freezes.
• A card asking them beforehand works exactly the same way as asking a godparent.

Promises and wording

• 'We promise to love you, listen to you and let you become whoever you're going to be.'
• 'We promise to give you roots to grow from and room to go your own way.'
• 'I promise to be someone you can talk to when you can't talk to your parents.'
• 'I promise to turn up. For the big things and the boring ones.'
• 'We chose your name because...' - a short explanation, which guests always love.
• 'Today, in front of everyone who loves you, we say your name out loud and claim you as ours.'
• Close with a toast rather than a blessing: 'To [name].'

Readings that work

• 'On Children' from Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet.
• 'Oh, the Places You'll Go!' by Dr Seuss - an extract, not the whole thing.
• 'Walking Away' by C. Day-Lewis, for older children.
• 'Wherever You Are, My Love Will Find You' by Nancy Tillman.
• A letter written by a grandparent, read aloud.
• Song lyrics, read rather than sung.

Naming ceremony gifts and cards

• Same as a christening, minus anything religious.
• A framed print with the child's name, date and meaning.
• A keepsake box for the certificate and the cards.
• A book with a message inside from each guest.
• A candle for the parents.
• Money towards savings, said plainly in the card.
• Cards should say welcome, promise and love - skip the blessings.

Planning the day

• Pick the people first, then the venue. Numbers drive everything else.
• Decide who's leading it before you write anything.
• Keep the ceremony under forty minutes. Children set the limit, not you.
• Print an order of the day so guests know what's happening.
• Give every reader and guide parent their words a week in advance.
• Set up a table for the certificate, the candle and the guest book.
• Bunting, banners and a cake topper turn a village hall into an occasion.
• Nominate someone to take photographs so the parents don't have to.

Shop welcome and new baby cards

How to write it so it lands

• Explain the name during the ceremony. It's the part guests remember.
• Give guide parents their promise in writing a week beforehand.
• Have a wet-weather plan if you're doing it in a garden - a gazebo is £40 well spent.

Where to shop next

• What is a christening?
• Christening gift ideas
• Baptism gifts
• Godparent gift ideas
• Holy Communion explained
• First Holy Communion gifts
• Confirmation gifts
• Naming ceremony guide
• What to write in a christening card
• Christening card messages
• Christening cards
• Christening gifts
• Godparent gifts
• First Holy Communion cards
• Confirmation cards
• New baby cards
• Scented soy candles
• Christening decorations
• Christening celebration ideas
• Planning the party? Birthday party ideas
• How to make a balloon arch
• Photo booth prop ideas

Frequently asked questions

What is a naming ceremony?

A non-religious ceremony welcoming a child, in which parents and chosen guide parents make promises in front of family and friends. It has no legal status - registering the birth does that.

How much does a naming ceremony cost in the UK?

A register office ceremony is usually £150 to £250, and an independent or humanist celebrant £250 to £450. Led by a friend it costs nothing; a typical whole day for forty guests runs £400 to £700.

What do you call godparents at a naming ceremony?

Guide parents, guardians, mentors, supporting adults or odd parents. There's no rule about how many you have or what you call them.

Is a naming ceremony legally binding?

No. It has no legal effect and doesn't change the child's registered name or appoint legal guardians. Registering the birth and making a will do those jobs.

What age should a child be for a naming ceremony?

Any age. Most are held between three months and a year, but they're also used for older children, adopted children and to mark a new family coming together.

What do you give as a naming ceremony gift?

The same as a christening without the religious element: a keepsake with the date, a framed print, a book signed by the guests, a candle for the parents, or money towards savings.